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Memories of Nana

 I sit in my grandmothers office, 

Trying to process the post mortem.

I face the familiar with feelings missing the target of my soul.

I stare at items that bore no value, yet now they wear an immense price:

A photograph, a chair, a lamp, her cards.

She kept every one that I sent, that we sent, somehow in memory of us.

Now we look at them in memory of her,

Remembering the thoughts and decisions we took:

Wondering why, wondering how, wondering if, wondering when. 

Why did I not spend as much time as I could?

She was 93, death was nearly on the hood.

How did I not see as much worth in every second I spent at her side?

Instead I would color, or eat, or simply abide.

If she was here what would I say?

"Tell me everything, I want to know it all, you have so much to teach me, I am here to hear all"

"When will I see you gain?", I used to ask.

I wish I would've spent more time in the past.

    American death seems so different from that of Athenians. "Comfort, therefore, not condolence, is what I have to offer to the parents of the dead...fortunate indeed are they who draw for their lot a death so glorious as that which has caused your morning,"-Pericles. The poem above is a poem I wrote a day after the death of my grandmother. Aside from the funerals of our beloved military, American funerals seem to be a celebration of where our relative is going drenched in the sad wet blanket of how little time we had with them. I know that because of the melting pot that is American culture funerals widely vary but for the funerals I have attended sadness can't help but penetrate the joy. While I wish I had the time to dig into the original greek words for comfort and condolence, I think it would be best to simply dig into the English words. The Merriam Webster's first definition of comfort is to give strength and hope to, whereas the definition of condolence is sympathy with another in sorrow. 

    Pericles did not seek to let the sorrows of the battle affect the troubles of tomorrow, instead he sought to let the sorrows of today drive on the power of the future. He respected the strength of the soldiers but also expected it as it was a duty of every Athenian. "you must reflect that is was by courage, sense of duty, and a keen feeling of honour in action that men were enabled to win all of this,"- Pericles. The extremely sensitive feeling of honour bled through every Athenian and Pericles made note of that. He shows us the why they fought for after he told us the what they were fighting for. They fought for the freedoms of all men, for a government that was superiorly original. A government which they believed set a pattern for others to follow. "Further we provide plenty of means for the mind to refresh itself from business. We celebrate games and sacrifices all the year round,"- Pericles. While that may sound like your stereo typical sandals ad (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ji3cZ5FNdUE&feature=youtu.be), he said this to emphasize the reason for sacrificing your life; to let the greek "good life" continue. 

    Although Pericles funeral speech was very different from that which you would typically hear at an American funeral it was a poignant reminder to the Athenians that we must not be trouble for too long because they died for a good cause and the Athenians should be as well. We should be grateful because unlike the greeks we have a pure understanding where our loved ones go when they pass we have a hope. I am reminded of an all-too-often-taken-out-of-context verse; Jeremiah 29:11, "For I know the plans I have for you - this is the LORD's declaration - plans for your well-being, not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope." That verse is followed by the actions of seeking God, which all the more points back (well forward) to our Savior that "But seek first the kingdom of God and all these things will be provided for you."- Matthew 6:33. We have a future an hope which we seek as the kingdom of God, on our way though God provides for us as we eagerly seek his promise. 


I commented on Abbie Hedden and Caroline Tucker's blogs.

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